Ew, No: Top Ten Things That Will Make Me Instantly NOT Want To Read A Book

Top ten Tuesday is an awesome meme hosted by those great ladies at the Broke and the Bookish.

Top ten Tuesday is an awesome meme hosted by those great ladies at the Broke and the Bookish.

Ah, that moment that you are going through Goodreads and come across a book that your entire being rejects. I read a lot so I tend to know what I like and what is going to annoy me.  Here are the things that I  automatically pass over when adding to the mountain that is my TBR pile. 

 I am writing this list but, of course, there are always exceptions... mostly due to an author that I love using one of these tropes.


Source

Source

Distopia

Unless you have something pretty frickin' different to sell me (doubtful), I am bored as hell with this genre. Oh, yes, the world seems creepily perfect, but with some horrifying secret underneath. What's this? Is it possibly a parallel with modern life!? Shocking!


Biker Gangs

Am I supposed to be overlooking the rampant misogyny? Yeah, no. I am not cool with the illegal biker gang thing, and even the legal ones aren't all that interesting to me. Maybe there is something about freedom or community? Not for me.


The MC is a Middle Aged or Older White Man

Possibly he is a literature professor and contemplating cheating on his wife. He is boring, and I have better things to do with my time. 

 


Southern Belle

Nope. I hated pretty much everything about and associated with this trope. OMG: I do not care about your racist family and their slow decline into gentile poverty after the civil war and how that makes it so hard to be you. Related-ish: Beauty pageants. Both boring and creepy to reading about.


Translated Books

This one kills me. I WANT to like translated books. They should be some of my favorites. Finally books from interesting  places by awesome people who live there. But then I get hung on on the awkwardness of the phrasing (which you know doesn't exist in the original language) I don't want to read a translated work. I want the skills to read them all in their original languages. This leads me to a pouting spiral about my lack of multilingual skills. (I SHOULD speak seven languages- I actually speak one and three-quarters with the lamest amount of five other languages. It is embarrassing). Petition for language implants because I have no linguistic talents.


Problematic Books

I am not as good at picking these out from the blurb as I would like to be. I think I need to pay attention to feeling weird about a book. I have noticed that when I am uneasy reading a blurb often someone much more in tune with the issues has already articulated the problem. If I am able to notice problematic elements (or have them pointed out to me), I will pass on the book. There are more than enough great books in the world that I won't miss it.


Sports

I have yet to read a novel that focuses on sports that I have enjoyed. Either the sports itself is pretty much ignored, or the story/character development is completely overlooked. Do not like. And since I have very little emotional attachment to sports I am not naturally drawn to them. 


Someone on the Cover is Wearing a Cowboy Hat

Country fine, small town is fine, rural is fine. Lazy stereotyping is not. These are often the kind of books that use phrases like, "rootin' tootin' good," and other such nonsense. I will be giving these a hard pass. Related: ANYTHING having to do with country music.


Love Triangles

"If one hot guy is good then two hot guys will be twice as good!"  Um, no. I am not alone in this, I know, but if there is even a hint of a love triangle in a book, then I am 100% done with it.  There is no coming back from that.  

I think that authors do this to show us how desirable and awesome the character is but it always makes them seem manipulative and untrustworthy to me.


The Main Character or Love Interest is Famous

No. No. No. This could be because fame in and of itself is what I imagine that one of the lower circles of hell would be like. But anything, where there is the potential for the character to be surrounded and mauled by fangirls/guys, is not going to be something that I pick up.

Do you have hard and fast rules about what you will or will not read?

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